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THE DOCTOR'S CATCHPHRASES
The Doctor usually says: "Please state the nature of the medical emergency." whenever he comes online.
Catchphrase 1: "I'm a doctor, not a [....]"
and variants (including other speakers) This is the catchphrase that is heard most often apart from "Please state the nature...".
jump to Catchphrase 2 "This is a sickbay, not a [....]"
BACKGROUND The catchphrase originated for the ship's doctor in Star Trek with Dr Leonard 'Bones' McCoy's "I'm a doctor, not a bricklayer." [TOS: The Devil In The Dark], although the first mention was in the early [TOS] episode [TOS: The Corbomite Maneuver]: "What am I, a doctor or a moon-shuttle commander?" Star Trek writers streamlined the words and they have become a catchphrase that spans several Star Trek series e.g. in [DS9] Dr Bashir uses the quote a couple of times e.g. [DS9: Trials And Tribble-lations] "I'm a doctor, not an historian", but it is USS Voyager's Doctor who has made the most of it.
| year |
episode number and name |
words |
speaker/addressee |
picture click the Doctor's holocamera for pop-up screenshot |
| 2371 |
[#5 Phage] |
I'm a doctor, Mr Neelix, not a decorator. |
the Doctor to Neelix |
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| 2372 |
[#23 Parturition] |
I'm a doctor, not a voyeur. |
the Doctor to Janeway |
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| 2372 |
[#29 Prototype] |
Doctor: "I shouldn't have to remind you: I'm a doctor-"
Torres: "-not an engineer. Right." |
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| 2372 |
[#36 Investigations] |
I'm a doctor, not a performer. |
the Doctor to Neelix, discussing the Doctor's slot on Neelix's shipwide show 'A Briefing With Neelix' |
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| 2373 |
[#43 Basics, Part Two] |
I'm a doctor, not a counter-insurgent. |
the Doctor to himself on finding himself apparently alone on USS Voyager after they strand the crew on a planet |
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| 2373 |
[#46 The Swarm] |
"I have pointed out over and over again: I am a diagnostic tool, not an engineer." |
EMH diagnostic program (created in the image of his creator, Dr Lewis Zimmerman) |
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| 2373 |
[#51 Future's End, Part Two] |
I'm a doctor, not a database. |
the Doctor to villain Henry Starling who has kidnapped him |
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| 2373 |
[Star Trek VIII: First Contact] |
I'm a doctor, not a doorstop. |
the EMH aboard USS Enterprise NCC-1701-E to Dr Beverly Crusher as she activates him to stall the Borg while she and others escape into the Jefferies tube network |
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| 2374 |
[#82 Message in a Bottle] |
I'm a doctor, not a commando. |
the EMH Mark 2 aboard USS Prometheus to the Doctor |
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| 2374 |
[#82 Message in a Bottle] |
I'm a pilot, Harry, not a doctor. |
Paris to Kim, trying to persuade Kim to program a new EMH in the Doctor's absence |
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| 2375 |
[#96 Drone] |
I'm a doctor, not a peeping-tom. |
the Doctor to Torres after contacting her while she is taking a sonic shower |
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| 2375 |
[#107 Gravity] |
I'm a doctor, not a battery. |
the Doctor to Tuvok and Paris when they are stranded on a planet trapped in a gravity sinkhole |
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| 2375 |
[#108 Bliss] |
I'm a doctor, not a dragon-slayer. |
the Doctor to Qatai after Qatai invites him to join him in his hunt of the bio-plasmic lifeform |
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| 2376 |
[#144 Life Line] |
I'm a doctor, not a zoo-keeper. |
the Doctor to Dr Lewis Zimmerman after deactivating Zimmerman's pet holo-iguana |
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| 2377 |
[#155 Flesh And Blood, Part One] |
I'm a doctor, not an engineer. |
the Doctor to Iden, a holographic freedom fighter, after Iden kidnaps him to 'treat' the damaged holograms among his crew |
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On occasion, the Doctor alters the "I'm a..." to refer to someone else. In 2376 in [#144 Life Line]:
Troi, via comms: "There's something wrong with the EMH."
Barclay, via comms: "Can, can you be more specific?"
Doctor, via comms: "She's a Counsellor, Lieutenant, not an engineer."
On occasion, other main crew (ensemble cast) give variations of the Doctor's catchphrase. For instance:
| 2374 |
[#82 Message In A Bottle] |
I am a pilot, Harry, not a doctor. |
Paris is expected to replace the Doctor while he is in the Alpha Quadrant and fears he may be stuck in the medical post if the Doctor fails to return. Paris complains to Kim that Sickbay is hardly the helm of a starship, when Kim responds: "Did you accidentally inject yourself with some kind of psychotropic agent?" |
| 2376 |
[#133 Virtuoso] |
I'm an engineer, not a costume designer. |
Torres to the Doctor after he requests, for his concert to the Qomar: "While we're at it, Lieutenant, I'll need some help with my wardrobe." |
Catchphrase 2: "This is a sickbay, not a [....]"
BACKGROUND The catchphrase developed from Catchphrase 1. There are probably more instances of Catchphrase 2 than those given here; I shall add them as I find them.
| year |
episode number and name |
words |
speaker/addressee |
picture click the Doctor's holocamera for pop-up screenshot |
| 2371 |
[#1 and #2 Caretaker] |
This is a sickbay, not a conference room. |
the Doctor to Janeway, Chakotay, Tuvok, Paris, Neelix and Kes (Part 2 of [#1 and #2 Caretaker]) |
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| 2374 |
[#92 Demon] |
This is a sickbay, not a dormitory. |
the Doctor to Chakotay and Neelix; Neelix wants to sleep in sickbay's more comfortable environment after extreme power shortages require the crew to change to minimal accommodation |
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| 2375 |
[#108 Bliss] |
This is a sickbay, not an arsenal. |
the Doctor to Qatai, in Seven's presence, after Qatai wants to see Voyager's weapons manifest |
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I made the border page background using the drawing of a hypospray in Encyclopaedia. Drawing of the Doctor's holo-imager from Encyclopaedia.
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